Wandering Cold [Open to 1]

[Remus]

He had spent the morning, since dawn's break, hiking alone across the mountainous terrain of Yavin VIII. It was a meditative experience to wander open land, and such experiences nearly had Remus convinced that he could manage the life of a hermit without any problem. It was an idea to entertain, if only for fanciful amusement. He found several isolated spots out in the high, rocky wastes where he and his wyrwulf companion Cailín would stop for a few moments at a time, resting with water and meditation, before continuing on their way. He liked it here, where no-one could disturb him.

A former Sith he was, and though he had been accepted into the Jedi with open arms, he preferred his privacy much as he always had done. From days and weeks of travelling across the cold vacuum of space as a smuggler for various cartels, to sitting atop his favourite spot on Munto Codru away from the Sith temple, now to wandering the Yavin mountains alone with Cailín, solitude was his close friend and always had been. Not a soul was to be found until they reached the Mountain Side Tavern.

Cailiín following quietly at his heel, the Jedi Apprentice stepped in from the mountainous cold to be greeted with the welcome of tavern warmth. The sound of quiet chatter filled the room to a gentle level and the smell of burning wood, boiling tea and fermented hops filled his nostrils as he made his way to the bar area where the barkeep greeted him warmly.
"Morning!"
"Good morning. A pot of sapir tea, please."
"For one?"
"Yes, thank you." He looked across the room for an empty table and suddenly the layout of the building was familiar to him again. It had been a long time since he had visited this tavern, but it was as if he had only last come but a day ago.
"I will bring it over to you when it's ready, just take a seat."
"Thank you," he said quietly as he found a table.

[Keeva Thymes]

Keeva Thymes had noticed the new Apprentice enter the Tavern. How could one not when a pet wyrwulf was on your heals? She had also witnessed his promotion ceremony with mixed feelings. Having been scared, both physically and emotionally by Sith in the past, it was hard for the Guardian to see this man as anything different.

Yet, he didn’t give off that dark arua that many Sith carried with him... and he was trained up in the prison for a while. She had to accept the fact that if the Masters and Council members found him fit to be promoted. They also found Vega fit to be Apprentice... Keeva noted darkly to herself.

It was wrong of her to think that, and regretted the thought immediately afterwards. She gave the ex-sith, now Jedi Apprentice another glare before turning her head back around and sipped more of her wine at the bar.

[Remus]

Remus sat silently, his gaze softened as his mind quietened into a semi-meditative state, as he absorbed the low hum of tavern life; the hushed chatter, the splintering of burning wood, the brewing of caffa. Outside, cold winds whistled at the windows and door, and beside him, at his feet, Cailín breathed lightly through her wet nose, eyes closed in the kind of half-sleep a canine would have. She was aware of everything, though. Remus could feel her, as she could feel him, constantly.

He was pulled out of his meditation as the barkeep brought him a pot of freshly brewed tea, which Remus was thankful for. The cold of the mountain had bit at him all morning, and the humble portion of breakfast he had at dawn was no longer fortifying. The barkeep had also brought a generous bowl of water for Cailín, who sat up to drink without a sound, and as he placed it on the ground, Remus' eyes met with those of an apparent Jedi sitting at the bar. It was not a look of pleasure that he had found, and he tried not to let it bug him, for he understood its reasoning. Quietly, he brought his attention back to Cailiín, scratching affectionately along the ruff of her neck.

[Keeva Thymes]

Tapping her finger at the bar, Keeva was torn on how to proceed. Part of her wanted to drown the rest of her wine and leave as quickly as possible, but another part wanted to confront the man. Yet, she didn’t know if she could trust her own temper at the moment. It was like facing Derakai all over again, she knew he wasn’t his clone, but he brought back such painful memories when she looked at him. With Remus, she knew he was once a sith, but wasn’t anymore.

She went to sip her wine and found the glass empty. Keeva wait another few moments before turning around. She had every intention of walking out the door, but instead found herself taking a seat across from Remus, a hard, distrustful look on her face.

“I know... I know you’re an Apprentice now. But tell me one thing, why did you join the Jedi?” She demanded.

[Remus]

Cailín was startled a moment, and raised her head from the water bowl to stare in silence at the newcomer, though she did not engage in any offensive stance. Remus, too, was a little taken aback from the abruptness and bluntness of the stranger's question, yet they both remained silent and unmoving for several long moments. The Apprentice understood the reasoning behind this Jedi's questioning, but he admitted to himself that she perhaps was being slightly brash with the whole situation. But who was he to judge? The Jedi had a right to hold suspicion with him, particularly with the name Vega Van-Derveld written so freshly in their history books. Remus took a moment to answer, and when he did he felt he ought to be honest and tell the young Jedi what she wanted, or perhaps needed to hear.

"I have spent many years snuffing out the lives of those I deemed beneath me. I have brought terrible atrocities and monumental suffering to innocent beings across the galaxy and thought very little of it, and this was both during and before my time with the Sith. But when I was forced to face my own demons, my own suffering that nearly sent me completely mad, I had nobody to turn to except for one who I knew would help me without question. This person was a Jedi. She helped me face my deepest, darkest fears - the kind of experiences that, after all of the monstrosities I had committed, made me feel human - but I knew that it was both her duty as a friend as well as her service as a Jedi that caused her to come to my aid."

He took a deep breath. Though he was not keen to relive these moments again, he felt it best he relay them now. Cailín gave a soft whine.

"Time passed, and I had some of the most crippling, moving and enlightening experiences I have had to date, but it was this Jedi who got me through it all. After this point, I spent a lot of time away from the Sith, feeling as though my connection with them had already been severed. I came here, to this very tavern, and found many of my Jedi friends support me as I told them of my considerations to defect. The kindness, humility and comfort they gave me only further intensified my realisations, and eventually it was Master Satkia and Master Amalia who welcomed me when I finally made the decision and came to Yavin."

He sat back in silence, eyes unmoving as they directed towards the young girl. She wanted to know, and he had told her, though slightly abridged was the telling.

[Keeva Thymes]

Well, at least he didn’t lie, or try to give her some pity story that was meant to tug at the heartstrings of another. Keeva had to grant Remus that. Her face still remained hard, and her eyes never left his. It was as if the two were sizing the other up, their words and their appearance, maybe Keeva more than Remus.

She processed what he said over in her head. He didn’t give the name of the Jedi who came to help him, nor the details of his enlightenment, only that he found himself distancing away from the Sith prior to his defect. There was no lie, no trace of concealment or treachery behind his words, not that Keeva would have been skilled to find any in either case. But, as she looked down to the wulf, at how she behaved, even to a stranger who talked so bluntly to her master. It was something to Keeva.

With a sigh, Keeva broke off the eye contact and fell back into the seat, her arms crossed in front her chest. “K, fine...” She said under her breath, then glanced at Remus again. “I’m sorry I’m so blunt... but i’ve had some really bad experiences with Sith in the past and I’m not the person to be fooled twice. Besides Vega, I haven’t spoken to any other Jedi who had defected from another faction before. I know the Council and Masters would make the right decision... I just had to check for myself.”

[Remus]

Remus contemplated the girl's expression as it softened and withdrew. Alas, many had rather bad experiences with Sith, for it was in their nature it seemed. They had a habit of instilling such experiences. Inside, he gave a shudder as he thought of how gladly he once associated himself with the Order. And, of course, Vega Van-Derveld left a deep scar for the modern Jedi to contend with. There was bound to be a level of mistrust, for a while, on the part of some Jedi towards him. He would simply have to learn how to deal with it.

"I know, I have anticipated it." It was one reason he preferred the solitude in recent times above much else. In the rare times where he would admit it to himself, it was largely because he was fearful of judgement, even though he had told himself how silly and fickle a thing it was to dwell upon such feelings. "It's alright, you don't need to worry about it." Cailín had already returned to her bowl for a few more laps before settling back down on the ground by Remus' feet, motionless and brooding in her own mysterious way, as an prolonged, awkward silence fell between the two Jedi.

[Keeva Thymes]

“But I should... it’s no healthy for me to feel so paranoid, especially if the Masters have deemed you worthy to be an Apprentice.” Keeva said with another sigh. “Your taking all this really well by the way.”

Placing her arms on the table, Keeva kept her eyes locked on Remus’s face. This was more for her own well being than his. Keeva knew she had to get over these feelings, to trust the Force, the Masters and the Council. If they all believed in Remus, than she would have to as well.

“My name is Keeva Thymes, Jedi Guardian.”

[Remus]

For a while, Remus said nothing, not really knowing what to say. The girl was troubled; she seemed to have her fair share of demons that nagged at her, and that was uncomfortable, even painful to witness. But what could he do? The second silence was broken when the young Jedi offered her name, which struck a note of faint familiarity with Remus. Finally, the Apprentice offered a small smiled in recognition, nodding lightly. Though Keeva most likely already knew his name, he told her anyway out of courtesy.
"Remus. Can I buy you a drink?"

[Keeva Thymes]

“Yes, you may.” Keeva said with a nod of her head. “Tea, please.”

She then mulled over a question she had in her mind for some time, however it was personal and she was unsure how Remus would react to it. So far, he’d been pretty patient with her.

“Can I ask you a personal question... actual more than one... again?”

[Remus]

Remus nodded and plucked at the air to catch the attention of the barkeep, signalling for another pot of tea to be brought over, and he could see him working at it immediately, plucking freshly cut tea leaves from one of the many tea drawers and placing them into another well-kept pot as water was set to boil. Curiosity struck him as Keeva put the request to him. Quietly, plainly, the Apprentice obliged, nodding firm and silence.

[Keeva Thymes]

“What was it like in... the prison?” Keeva asked. It was a loaded question, she knew it, but she had never been up there before. Had never had a reason to. She was curious to know what it was like, especially from the point of view of someone who was placed inside.

“I know you must be glad to be out of there, but if you feel comfortable talking about it. I would like to know your experiences up there. Maybe it will help me understand your flight better?”

[Remus]

Remus dwelled on the question for a while, struggling to find the right words for it. The Jedi had made their best attempts to give him a comfortable living arrangement, but a prison with the tendency to be more accommodating for its guest was still a prison when it came down to it. Spending day after day for a year in that single cell must have had some negative effects on his psychology, however he had been in worse environments for longer periods of time in the past. Finally, he was able to find the words.
"It was... fine." He fell silent again for a moment, taking his time with his descriptions. "My master took great care to make sure I was comfortable during my time there, but it was still a cell. I was brought to the edge of my mind on several isolated occasions, but myself and Cailín both were able to get each other through it. When compared to Stars End, though, you could say it was a breeze. I have no criticisms, and I am not one to complain."

[Keeva Thymes]

“So you and your friend here have been through a lot then.” Keeva said, realizing that although Remus answered her question, he kept it vague. She should have known better, it wasn’t like he would open up and give away all of his secrets like that.

“Wow, it must have been hard for you, though i’ve been known to isolate myself for periods of time. How long have you and Cailin been together?”

[Remus]

Remus gave a slight smirk to the grim tone of the discussion.
"This was not as horrid as you might think. I had visitors, and books, all the books I wished." It was true that he had borrowed a lot, and he couldn't help but laugh the day he first walked into the Jedi Archives, after being released and promoted, with a huge pile in tow, as many of the librarians already knew his name well. Indeed, his cell would always be filled with high stacked books, a characteristic his new chambers already had begun to adopt.
"Isolation is not bad to experience, though. It is, admittedly, something I greatly savour, as much can be learned when one is alone with their infinite thoughts and the infinite galaxy."

He looked at Cailín, who looked back nonchalantly, exhaled through her nose with a squeak, glanced at Keeva with intrigue and patience, and back to her master. For a second, his eyes fell into hers, as hers did into his, and for a moment it was almost as if, amidst that flowing stream of melded consciousness between them both - where he would speak and she could only listen and respond with emotion - it was as if he actually heard her voice echoing through to him, saying just one word. A word unrelated to the present moment, but a pre-emptive meditation on her part, an observation of a future time with no comprehensible distance, merely as a passing thought: ~Danger~
Simple and primitive, as, for the most part, Cailín's mind had been for the longest part, but training under her master, exposed so much to the Force and with such a bond between them as well, it was an intelligent observation, and though Remus had not felt it before, he believed the warning, as vague as it was. What danger was this? Where would it come from? When would it come? Maybe it was something small, like a minor conflict in a spar, but Remus did not think so. It certainly felt... dangerous. As if he would do to prepare, but how could one prepare with such a vague notion?

He snapped himself out of the moment of hypnotism.

"Just short of three years, I would say," he finally told Keeva. He looked at Cailín solemnly and pensively before continuing. "But, you see, Cailín and I share a Force bond. I am bound to her as much as she is bound to me. I feel her thoughts, her emotions, her subtle complexities, and she sees the same in me. The Force has conspired for us be with one another, in some way, for some reason."